The PhD journey is such a unique journey. Some days I feel fueled by the momentum to make real change in the world, and other days I feel lost, in a seemingly perpetual state of limbo where ideas are not flowing, the relevance of my research seems lost to me, and my general sense of belonging in under attack. In this post, I reflect on my almost two-year PhD journey and share some of the challenges I believe most PhDs tend to experience at one point or another.
The Misconception of ‘Enough Time‘
Some of you might disagree, but in my experience, the general misconception of 3-5 years being more than enough time to finish your thesis, needs a bit more careful consideration. The truth about the current academic environment is that the system is set up in a specific way, where you need to publish well if you expect to find a decent job after your PhD. Among some of the more senior PhDs I have spoken to, the general consensus seems to be that preparing for the job market is a really stress-inducing process. Even the more proactive among them, who start these preparations from day one, also don’t seem to navigate this process without some level of discomfort. We can run around and say the system is broken, however, the fact of the matter is that we are PhD students, in the very early stages of a hopefully very long academic career, and fighting the system would ultimately be ‘career suicide’.
So, we must play the game, which often means having an A*/FT job market paper, which by itself is no joke. And in most paper-based PhDs you need 3 papers to complete your thesis. As most of you know, the turn-around time for an average A*/FT paper is at best 2 years (depending on your field). This, together with the fact that we need to have 3 papers for our thesis (granted not all have to be published during your PhD), gives the sense that 3-5 years for a PhD is really not a long time. My takeaway at the moment is that you need to play the academic game (trying to change the game without an established reputation is a recipe for disaster), and be as strategic as possible, by responding to special issues or calls for research from editorials, and regularly attending conferences. All of which increase your chances of finding collaborators and capitalizing on sometimes easier pathways to publication.
The Unproductivity Guilt
Since I am still technically in the earlier stages of my PhD, the struggles of managing my working schedule and routines have somewhat subsided, but often require a bit of TLC. One of the feelings I felt most regularly of all was the feeling of guilt for not working every day all day. This stems from a variety of sources, including my own expectations, my friends and family’s expectations, and my fellow PhDs’ comments/opinions/judgments (please select the option that seems most diplomatic). This ultimately differs from one PhD to the next, but it is important to note that you should not fall into the most common trap (which most PhDs fall into at the start of their program) of comparing with other PhDs.
The simple fact of the matter is that no two PhD students have the same schedule, and comparing with each other in terms of the number of hours you work is such a pointless exercise. I also happen to be very guilty of falling into this trap, purely since comparison has always been the tool I used to measure my progress, particularly during high school and university. However, a PhD is a different game, and each PhD journey is significantly different from another. So, my main takeaway here is that you need to work on setting up your ideal workday, that does not depend on any other person, which is customized to your capacity and for your convenience.
Side note: For that PhD in your cohort that always makes a point of commenting on the time you choose to arrive at and leave the office. I recommend embracing the time-traveling gossip with a smile and a shrug – after all, punctuality is its own reward, and being fashionably late to their drama is just icing on the cake!
Conclusion
As we go through this journey, I think it’s important to embrace the confusion and general state of limbo as an essential part of the PhD journey. Stressing about the things we don’t have control over just creates more fog and confusion. Also, remember that this journey of “creating new knowledge” is essentially non-linear and by experiencing this state of limbo or discomfort might just mean that we are on the right track.
I would like to get your take on this discussion, feel free to leave a comment below.
